20 November 2006

an entry about my labour. i hope i'm able to remember the details, they say labour makes you forget some things.

my due date was 1 december 2006, but during my last 2 check-ups my gynae had confirmed that i would be delivering early. as the days progressed, she was able to choose a date - 20 november 2006 - as my delivery date. first, she decided i could be induced on that day. after more check ups, she said i've induced myself and she would just assist on that day. on 19 nov, the night before the chosen delivery date, after finished packing my clothes, hubby's and amir's clothes in anticipation of the week ahead, i experienced 'the show'. that was around 10:30pm. hubby was sleeping and i decided to not wake him up. i called up the maternity ward, asking them if it was necessary for me to be admitted that night, as i had already planned to come over in the morning. plus i had no contractions. the nurse said as long as i was comfortable, i can stay at home. they booked a room for me as they wanted me in early the next morning.

i didnt sleep too well. i was anxious, scared (more so that i was with amir), i was on edge, i was excited...i had a lot of mixed feelings i couldnt explain. before i knew it, it was 6:30am. i woke hubby up, took a quick shower and performed the subuh prayers. then i checked our bags and the house - ensured the windows and doors were locked, lights switched off, laundry set aside and wrote a note to my sis to let her know what she should do when we're not around.

at 7:30am we all left the house. hubby sent me to the hospital while my sis took amir to her workshop. we took care of the admission process and hubby left me in the room to attend a meeting nearby. he told me to let him know of any progress and call him if i wanted him to come back. i sat there wondering what i should do, when the nurse came in and asked me to follow her to the labour room. there were 2 other rooms occupied. she asked me to strip and get into the labour "baju". then she proceeded to give me something so that i can go to the loo. while waiting for the anema to take effect, she asked me what painkiller i wanted, which anesthetist attended to me during my previous delivery and who would be the baby's peadiatrician.

i sat alone for a while, before the doctor came in around 9:30am. she checked me, and told me i was already 4cm dialated. it was going faster than we planned. she broke my water bag and informed me that i will be given epidural soon. i quickly called up hubby as i didnt want to go through that alone. he came back within half an hour, while i was having a quick breakfast.

the epidural shot was given, while hubby spoke to the anesthetist about circumcising the baby. darn it...there goes my plans to circumcise immediately. hubby and i sat and talked for a bit, before the nurse came in again at 11am. now i was already 5cm dialated. i couldnt feel the contraction any longer, but can see from the graph that it was coming at a constant rate (2 minutes apart, the nurse told me). then all off the sudden i felt a lot (and i mean a lottt) of water. feeling scared and confused i told hubby to get the nurse. she said it was the amniotic fluid coming out. as i am having contractions, the baby's head is pushed downwards and with that the fluid comes out. ahhh...i see...so that's what water breaking means.

sure enough, fluid comes out everytime i had a "good" contraction. ensuring me that the labour is progressing nicely, she told me to rest and take it easy. i managed to get a bit of sleep and i also had time to preformed solat hajat in my head and in my heart. i felt better after that.

at 12:30pm my gynae called to check how i was doing. the nurse said i was already 9cm dialated and she started getting me to push while waiting for the doctor. about an hour later, i was in full labour. i was pushing and panting and breathing. i didnt feel anything but had help from the doctor, the nurse and hubby. my mind went back to when i delivered amir, when i couldnt push properly being under epidural. it took over an hour and the help of vacuum before amir was delivered. i was thinking...oh no, i cant go through an hour of this. then the doctor said...you're doing very well, i can see the head, its almost out. then she turned around and said something to the nurse, about OP (i've got to check that abbreviation out). she told me my baby's head was tilted upwards making it seem larger than it is. she had to use kiwi, some sort of vacuum, to tilt it down then pull it out. it took less than 3 minutes, i looked down and saw my baby's body halfway out.

another pull, and he was completely out and laid on top of my chest. i wanted to cry, i wanted to laugh, i wanted to hold him, but i dont know what i did. the nurse took him to give him his vitamin k shot and clean him and weigh him. hubby went to take wudhu to azan him. the gynae was stitching me up, but somehow it took longer than i remember it did with amir. my baby was given back to me. when hubby came out i signalled for him to take the baby, and i cried out...water...i need water...i've got a headache. then immediately, i was given the oxygen mask and lied down completely on my back. i was feeling feverish and felt i was going to faint. all i can hear is the doctor saying i had a tear and lost a lot of blood and my blood pressure was very low. they decided to leave me in the labour room while they took my baby to the nursery. i was there for almost 2 hours while they monitored me. within the 2 hours, i did get enough energy to ask for lunch (laparlahhh).

my parents called saying they were coming and hubby went down to greet them. they went to see my baby and stayed around until i was wheeled back into my room. after i got back my strength, my baby was brought to me for his first feed. he didnt want to eat much and slept through the visits (my sis took amir to see me, and i cried like a baby when he left). the nurse said his tummy was still full from the fluid he consumed inside my stomach and will start nursing tomorrow. i think its God's way of making the mother rest and recuperate. unfortunately, i couldnt rest. as the epidural wore off, i hurt like crazy. i requested for painkillers 3 times that night. i could feel the uterus contracting, i could feel the stitches and i could feel the epidural shot again. i wanted to scream and throw things. i looked at hubby and the baby in envy. they slept soundly while i was hurting.

i finally slept at 2am, though it wasnt a long sleep as my baby got up around 5am for his feed. after the feed hubby took and slept with him while i looked at the ceiling. no way i can sleep again. around 7am i called for the nurse to take the baby as i wanted to shower. hubby brought me into the bathroom, sat me down on the toilet seat and bathed me (he's so sweet). then he dressed me and let me lie down while we waited for breakfast. when my baby was brought back to me for feeds, he went down to have his breakfast.

i bonded with my baby and started feeling better. i still did ask for painkillers and was given pills to help with the blood lost. the next couple of days went on similarly. hubby was on hand to help me adjust my position, help me with breastfeeding, with my nature calls, with my bath, with my meals.

when we went back it was the same. he would attend to amir, he would do the laundry (except folding clothes), he would prepare and serve my meals, he would ensure the house ran smoothly while i just sat on the bed or on the couch. he would wake up at night to help me feed the baby and rock him to sleep after feed. he would even carry both the baby and amir at the same time. he slept with the baby during the day in another room, so that i can catch up on lost sleep and rest. he was my nurse, my janitor, my chef, my cleaner, my babysitter during the 2 days we were at home. i was worried about him as he didnt get enough sleep and was starting to feel feverish. in some ways, i'm glad my baby had to be re-admitted for jaundice on friday as it gave hubby some time to rest. today, i can see that he's feeling much better. i hope the next few weeks would be good for me, hubby and the boys. i'm feeling much better now and cant wait to get on my feet.

till then, i'm sure i can count on my number 1 hero to make me feel better.

sayang...thanks, i couldnt have done it without you. be prepared for a lot of b**ching this week :-)