i got a great big shocking news yesterday. a friend of mine offered me a job after a simple interview. it wasnt an interview to begin with. it was just a sitting down session, with her asking me 'i have this position - do you want to fill it?' 'how much are you willing to accept?' and 'when can you start?'. that's it. she didnt ask me much, she didnt even look at my transcripts. she just had my simple CV and said...can you start this week?
i am still confused. yeah, i would love to work at her place (the office is wayyy beyond cool), i would love to have a secure monthly income, i would love to do what they want me to do (its just so cool - cool for me, at least). but i have only 4 days...4 days to spend with my baby, my little terror, and then that's it...i have to hand him over to someone else. that's the only thing that's bringing me down. i spent a whole year just being with him, watching him grow, watching him cut his first tooth, watching him take his first solid, watching him hold his cup for the first time, watching him roll over, take him first step, crawl. i saw all that, and there's so much more i want to see.
but at the same time, working would benefit him too. he would be more independent compared to if i were to be with him all the time. he would know more people, rather than just daddy & mummy (who turn down invitations because they cant bear to let people babysit him). working would benefit me too, other than the money bit. i can get more time to myself, which is important now that i'm pregnant. i need space to relax, calm down and be at one with the baby i'm carrying. i can get more exercise too...not just exercise as in yoga or pilates or step reebok, but more of exercising my mind, my soul, my thoughts. i was a very active person when i was pregnant with amir, and alhamdulillah, that helped a lot during labour and during my confinement.
the pros seem to overweigh the cons, in this case. but i cant bear to leave amir. he's been my best friend & my source of laughter. he's been with me 24/7 since the day he was born and now to not being able to see him when i turn around is going to be so painful. how i wish i can turn back time and relive the year i had with him. but we have to move on. its still my dream to be a full time, stay at home mum but that dream will have to be put on hold. for now, at least. in the meantime, i can only pray that he will be in safe hands and he is fine and happy.
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
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...sayings
the value of marriage is not that adults produce children but that children produce adults - peter de vries
grown-ups never understand anything for themselves and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explainning things to them - antoine de saint-exupery
grown-ups never understand anything for themselves and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explainning things to them - antoine de saint-exupery
13 comments:
I did not realize that it was you leaving me comments on the journal hon, thus me not commenting here :)
And congratulations on your job offer. I, on the other hand, really wanted to go back to work. My brain needed some serious exercises, I say :) Bekarat rasa :)
Ohh..so thats why u asked about the daycare centre.
Kerja kat mana ni?
Congrats. Sometimes its good for you to go out and work. Aik nanti kerja sekejap, dapat maternity leave.. Heehehe best tuuu!!
kak mar - i got so many nicknames. hehehe. a'ah, my brain dah berkarat. that's why i started blogging, at least can use my brain a wee bit.
trueblue - i'll be at 37th floor, tower 2 :)
hot mama - yeah, then after maternity leave, lagi susah nak go back to work. leaving 2 at home :( eh, ada sushi king kat bawah my office...hehehehe...oh no, mothercare too (gasp!!)
gartblue, sedih betul nak imagine the look they have when we drive off. that's why i'm gonna campak him in my aunt's hse and run away without turning back :(
i'm at birai, the uninhibited area. the very hot area. u dekat2 ninuk. habis ur son nanti geng ngan her sons...hehehe. 4 right?? wow...best tu! i envy...
there is one mommy blogger sis elisa wrote about similar entry a few weeks back.
she used to work but now is a stay at home mom. I guess whatever you choose in life either stay at home or work it doesnt really matter. what matters most we mothers always strive to give the very best to our family and children. at the end of the day hopefully Allah will reward us for our sacrifices :)
Rezeki baby tu....congratulation!!! Don't worry about little Amir, he'll be fine. You could catch up during weekend :)
Hey so where's your new office?
Let me guess it is in MidValley or The Curve? This is the only place i know yg ada sushi king and mothercare..hahaha!!!
lazydaisy - at the moment, this is the best option for amir & for myself. he gets to interact with other people while i get some time to myself. insyaallah, its the best possible choice i can make.
nae - thanks. yeah, there's still the weekends and public holidays and the 2 months maternity leave. its not the end of the world. but i was there 24/7 for a year...sedih jugak. i'm actually more sad for him cos he has to adapt to new people. but it has to start sooner or later right?
hot mama - i wouldnt mind either. at least dekat rumah sikit. i'll be at klcc. noooo...so jauh, so 'city'!!
Hey..dekatla kita...
can go lunch together-gether...
Did u watch Desperate Hsewife last nite? Felicia's son started to have imaginary friend once she started working..
I never heard in my life in our culture ada imaginary friend, even when i was small pun i don't have.. Kalau dah ada tuu spooky! Hheehhe
hi , i bloghopped from hot mama
congrats! murah rezeki...
btw i'm at klcc too, boleh la lunch sama²!but i'll be here until june je, july i balik my HQ
alaa hot mama, i forgot lah. it clashes with csi:new york plak tu. kalau imaginary friend in our culture, dah kena "buat" lah tu ;)
alif's mummy...thanks & nice meeting you. so glad there's so many mummies in klcc. i dah lah tgh depress, being so far away from my baby. at least ada geng :)
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