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Wednesday, April 01, 2009

My Boys

hubby and i were talking a couple of days ago about the boys. towards the end of the discussion, hubby said, one thing he believed in was...how you treat your parents now will be how your children treat you. i know a lot of people believe that...like karma. personally, i dont. for me, how you treat your parents now, is not an indication or a sign of how you will be treated in the future but rather is an indication of how your parents treated you. to see how your children will treat you, you should look at how you treat them now.

i wasnt close to my parents. my father was busy most of the time but he tried to make time for us. my mother...well, we arent close, lets just leave it at that. because of that, i make it my main task to be in tune with what my children go through.

coming back from school, we would talk about what everyone did in school (whoever can talk that is...ariff usually answers with 'baaaahhhh...baaahhhh'). we greet each other with 'assalamualaikum' every morning, we go to sleep saying 'i love you' to every one each night (kinda like the waltons). we say 'sorry' when we're wrong, we say 'thank you'.

i kiss and hug and hold hands with the boys. i love my boys with passion and i want to teach them to show love to their parents and the brothers, no matter how old or how young they are.

dont get me wrong; i love my parents and i appreciate everything they've done for me. but i aim to take what i learnt growing up (from what they did and didnt do) and hope to turn it positively for my children. because to me...how i treat my children now, will, hopefully, be how they will treat me in the future.

Thank you for my babies, the boys I'm loving
Thanks for all the joy they're bringing
I cant live without them, I say in all honesty
What would life be?
Without the boys to care for, what are we?
So I say thank you for my babies
For giving them to me

13 comments:

dadaa said...

isnt dadaa one of the boys???

eiseais said...

u were already mentioned in the first word...sibuk.

Jaja said...

alamak, ku emo la pulak baca entry kali ni :-(

b_kim said...

huhu...daku emo gak.. byk persamaan... x dpt nak komen pgj... but i'm 100% agrees on your belief.. pakar kanak2/motivasi/ ahli kitab also said the same.. wat u treat will indicate wat will u receive in future...

alia natasha said...

nicely said....

i was afraid of that karma too...but i have been doing and will continue do like what you have been doing with you kids...

and i hope too, it would last forever... Amin.

mamasyazmar said...

this is well said!

growing up, my relationship with my mum wasn't so hunky-dory. only bila dah kawin and dpt anak, slowly we're warming up to each other (ni kes cucu punya pasal lah, altho i wud appreciate it if she wud butt out in the case of disciplining the kids).

i believe what you sow now will grow into what is to come in the future.

i was so afraid of becoming like her in terms of raising my kids (autocratic) but alhamdulillah i have hubby to keep me sane.

eiseais said...

jaja @ acik @ org nak pindah rumah baru...jgn emo, jgn emo :)

kim...tu lah, smalam sapa suh kasik kata2 semangat yg sungguh emo, terus kluar entry ni. hehehe...

alia...insyallah

mamasyazmar...i quote you too 'nicely said'. but for me, terbalik cos after i had my boys, the relationship got even worse because (like you) she's not supportive when i'm disciplining my boys. i mean, its not easy handling them, i dont need outside interference to make it worse! true...i was always afraid i'd end up treating my boys how i was treated but hubby and i are holding on to the principle of 'its not wrong to show love in this house'. thanks for your comment...it really made my day.

alia natasha said...

sally...when we used to stay at my parents, hubby was scolding Sarah in the room, tak pukul pun, marah je... then came in my parents, rushed in to take sarah out and scolded us instead and said, " if tak nak jaga anak tak pe..biar we all jaga!" we were like ...huh ??

honestly, when u said about mother/daughter relationship, i thought it was otherwise with you, maybe those were the school days kut...i actually faced the same thing too, so thats why i have lots of love saying, hugging, kissing with my children....and a hubby to remind me ," yang..you are beginning to be like your mother !"

thanks for this story, at least, i know i am not alone... *sob *sob

mommamia said...

u've got the point there sally,we learn from the experience,filter it and from there we make parenting job better,ikut acuan kita sendiri-kids nowadays are smarter and more complicated to handle;it's more on psychology part;hugs,kisses, loving words,apology,this is all the better approach for kids nowadays

sama2 la kita belajar menjadi ibu bapa yg baik(better),dat's y mummies out there including me love to read ur blog,we get something to learn from u,thanks

p/s:gmbr2 yg di attached turut meruntun jiwa pembaca2,sgt touched!

redrania said...

i'm trying to be fair for both..my parents n my childrens.like u, i do what i didnt get during my childhood.i kiss,i hug my childrens everyday.

i think both statement pun betul.coz our children tgk apa yg kita buat.one thing as a mother,i really pray a lot for them coz i believe doa seorang ibu paling mustajab kann...insyaAllah..

Cujie said...

thank you to you too super duper mommy...
hehehe...

gEe Eunjo said...

syahdu syahdan la pulak aku dibuatnye..

ღ Marisa Mardhia Online Shop ღ said...

sgt kagum dgn akak coz leh jg 4boys tanpa bantuan maid, leh jd cth kat mummy lain nieh, nk plak yg kat tadika tu ;)

...sayings

the value of marriage is not that adults produce children but that children produce adults - peter de vries

grown-ups never understand anything for themselves and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explainning things to them - antoine de saint-exupery
 
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